I discovered my love for digital art journaling two or three years ago. From that point on I created several digi art journaling pieces every month. Something happened late last summer, I’m not exactly sure what, that changed me. I seemed to lose all inspiration and stopped creating both digital scrapbooking pages and digital art journaling pages. Even as I started working on regaining my inspiration after the first of the year, and I am still not where I want to be, I could not create a digi art journaling page that I liked. I tried back in March but hated everything.
Losing my inspiration for digital art journaling was almost worse than losing my scrapbooking inspiration. It had become my favorite form of creativity. I hated losing my desire to make digi art journaling pages. I wish I could say that desire was 100% back. To be honest, I don’t know for sure. I do think I am on the right track. What I can finally say is that I have created a couple of pieces.
In January, Tangie Baxter resumed doing the Art Journal Caravan that she used to conduct at Scrapbook Graphics but in a simpler format. I had always wanted to try the caravan, but I couldn’t afford it. This time around, it is included in my subscription to the Art Journal Emporium. When she announced the resumption of the caravan, I was so excited to give it a try.
Each week, I have saved the weekly itineraries. Each week I have created nothing. You read that correctly, I had not created a single page for the caravan in 14 weeks. I hadn’t ignored the itineraries. I just didn’t seem to be able to draw any inspiration from any of the itineraries. In fact, I was beginning to think that it was time I faced the idea that I no longer enjoyed digital art journaling. (Let me tell you, it was an idea I did not like.)
Today, I decided to give the caravan one more time. I opened up last week’s itinerary and grabbed the color inspiration using Photoshop. I then began trying to decide how I was going to use all of the other ideas tat had been shared. Nothing was coming to me. I had just about decided that maybe the caravan wasn’t for me and I should unsubscribe when I came to an important realization. Maybe I didn’t have to use all of the ideas. Maybe I could just use a couple.
I decided to quit trying to use the parts of the itinerary that seemed to block me and only look at the color inspiration and the suggestion for creating a mosaic paper background. Those ideas seemed to sit with me even when the other stuff just didn’t work. Once I started, it didn’t take me long to realize that I did not really want to create an entire mosaic background. However, I finally found the inspiration I needed to create a page.
The last few years have seemed to be filled with way more downs than ups. Then, just as I was beginning to feel like I was on an upward trend, my world was rocked at the end of November when I lost my mom. Since then I have wanted to create a page that seemed to capture my feelings right now. To be honest, I don’t know if it truly captures the depths of how lost I have felt since November. But it’s a little glimpse into how I have been feeling.
This second page is actually something I started over a month ago. At the time, no matter what I did, I could not come to like anything I created. On Thursday, as I was going through Evernote, I noticed a page of credits with no actual layout. I wanted to fix that, so it was time for a little hard drive exploration. When I found the page on my hard drive, I remembered what happened. However, I just couldn’t figure out why I didn’t like the page. So I added a couple of torn paper pieces and called it done. This is what I created.
I do remember why I started creating the page. At the time, I wanted to create a visual reminder to stop dwelling on past issues that I couldn’t change. Maybe I didn’t like the page because I was no where near ready to do that. I don’t know if I am where I need to be yet, but maybe I am ready to at least try.
I am so happy that I have finally found a bit of creative inspiration. Maybe now I can finally begin moving in the right direction. I am going to try.