Sun through the trees

So am I the only one that feels like most people don’t really know the real you? I feel like they see the person I show publicly but keep the real me to myself. I worry that if most people knew how I really felt about any number of topics that they would be annoyed, or worse yet not want anything to do with me.

I rarely share my opinions. Sometimes this is probably for the best as it wouldn’t benefit anyone. But there are times I really feel I have something to share and don’t. I don’t because I fear I will be judged and found lacking. Perhaps, they will decide to unfriend me on Facebook or ignore me at church. I am an extremely shy person by nature. Making my life harder by sharing the true me just doesn’t appeal to me.

I’m thinking about this right now because yesterday I realized that I had been unfriended on Facebook by someone I knew in high school. I found this out because I had been thinking lately that I hadn’t seen a post from this person in a very long time when previously they had been a very prolific poster. I wondered if they had left Facebook altogether. A quick search led me to discover this person was still there, but I was no longer a friend. Luckily, this isn’t someone with whom I was particularly close, but still kind of jarring because I don’t really know why. The only reason I could come up with is that around the last time I saw a post from this person I had replied and stated why I was in disagreement with what they had posted. (Almost every response this person receives in reply to their posts is affirmations of the correctness of what they had just said.

Too often on Facebook, I see plenty of people talking about how they have unfriended or will unfriend people who disagree with them. I don’t really understand this. I think life is more interesting when I am surrounded by people with a variety of opinions. Maybe life is easier the other way, but definitely less interesting. However, I don’t think most people feel this way.

All of this has led me to keep my true self hidden from most people. Not because what I think or feel is bad, I just don’t like being judged harshly simply because I think differently. At this point, you might be wondering if this is my declaration that I am going to change and begin showing my true self to people. Nope. I will continue keeping my opinions to myself. I am much too shy to do otherwise. I just want to know if I am the only person who lives their life this way.

If you’ve made it this far, I appreciate your stopping by. Until next time, don’t forget to document your memories.